by Mona Landsberg
“If I Can’t Keep my White Male Privilege, I Don’t Want to Be Part of Your Revolution”
Sleepaway camp suuucked, y’all. Must be all the hormones, that pesky uterus of mine whispering mean somethings in my ear: “These fuckers would rather ejaculate on the steps of the federal reserve…”
And all the other ladies who felt unsafe, silenced? Our menstrual flows must have synched up, because certainly no person in their rational mind would turn away from Duncan Plaza as it stood, filled with drunk, shirtless men bursting at the seams with The Right Answer.
The right answer seemed to be verbal attacks on banks, congress, dysfunctional schools– caricatures that represent oppressive power to the mainstream. But when a woman points out a strange power dynamic that plays out in her conversation with a man in camp and asks him to check himself, the defensiveness sets in. And sometimes, as took place at a specific General Assembly, a woman’s got to yell in order to be heard. With what quickness the confrontation became two-sided in the eyes of the campers! “She shouldn’t have yelled at him, we agreed this was a non-violent space.” Well, then. It is too convenient that this space, a space in which a sexual assault or harassment is actually viewed as commonplace, should suddenly become vehemently defended in terms of non-violence the moment that ladies start yelling.
Over the years, various men have taken “my best interest” on as their area of expertise. There is nothing less surprising to me than a group of menfolk who fancy themselves the gatekeepers to the land of revolution also taking on the hefty responsibility of, um…which bills may be posted to said gate. Post no bills that reference race or gender, please!
They are intimidated, you must understand. Be sensitive. You are asking that they let go of their power and that frightens them. Be kind. Remember ladies, make revolution with a smile. The cuter the revolution the better. (Please google Hot Chicks of Occupy Wallstreet)
“I’m just worried that you may be pushing away the people who are really on your side.” This warning from an “ally” after I defected, alienating him with my anger. My side?
How can I describe my side without you thinking I’m running away, tampon tucked between my legs?
I ____________(name) don’t give a shit about the federal reserve.
Stuff I think would make a real revolution possible: stop raping people.
My side? I want to stand with you! And no, no one delegated secretarial tasks to the ladies, but when our problems are not viewed as primary, then here we are again, like in every lefty movement, playing a supporting role. Please understand that your economic status, your debt, your level of unemployment don’t mean shit to me when my best friend was hog-tied and raped at gunpoint by three masked men in her own home. I’m not trying to be dramatic, this is real life for women every day. Show me that this scares you as much as it scares me. Then we can chill together and plot the decline, etc.
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sorry your experiencing this, i empathize with you….. we all have our reasons for joining, and i have my reasons for leaving our current occupation in wellington NZ………. my priority is to feed house and educate everyone, your issues lie in the education part… untill we start percieving women and men as human beings, instead of resources, people will continue to “rape and pillage”…. fight your fight, stand up for yourself, do it in person, not on blogs, Sam Mcpherson NZ
…wow, SamMcPhersonNZ, you kinda failed to get it, didn’t you?
Great post, Mona.
yeah – how come “rape and pillage” is in quotations. its kinda not a metaphor…
also, doing it in person is not an option when there is no safe space to fight these fights. we all know that blogs aren’t where we want to end up – but hearing from others gives us strength and community. if you’re so focused on education then tell people to end rape
Wahine ma, wahine ma, karanga mai karanga mai, kia kaha!
Whilst I have never been raped, I am quite conscious of the male intensive nature of Occupy. And certainly, at least one of the Occupations I have spent time on in NZ were composed largely of power-hungry, loud, easy-to-anger males. With a few agressive females also fighting for their share of meat. The sweet and sensible were often talked over, or felt too intimidated to speak up about the issues.
Passiveness is our own fear holding us back.
Aggressiveness fuels the fire.
But assertiveness is saying, “We are here, we are conscious, caring, spiritual beings. We stand for peace. We stand for cooperation. We stand for nurturing of the body and mind. Please don’t smoke next to me. I am listening to you. Please listen to what I have to say as it is worthwhile. I do not hate or fear you, but have compassion for your pain and wish to find the common ground and values so that we may work together, my friend.”
Calling all sensitive, empathetic beings, male and female. Please stand up. Have self respect, self control and be the change you wish to see. Share the love and say when the situation is not ok from a place of love.
Respect and honour the land, Papatuanuku, Gaia, or whatever you wish to call her. She will support you.